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The hashtag #PalinBrawl came forth this weekend to describe a free-for-all with fisticuffs in Alaska during which police were called to deal with a rowdy hillbilly family - the Palins, of course. It's almost the perfect Palin story. And there are multiple versions, each Palin-licious!
Here's the original widely-published account:
Sarah Palin and her family were at the center of a lively party last weekend that erupted into a fight, with daughter Bristol Palin allegedly throwing a right hook, a man who says he was a guest at the party told ABC News.
“She was punching him [another man] in the face like six times; it was an assault if I’ve ever seen one,” Eric Thompson said, adding that he was among 70 guests at the birthday party in Anchorage Saturday.
“It wasn’t a light punch either. She was really hitting him. I’m surprised he just sat there and took it.”
Political blogger Amanda Coyne reported that Sarah Palin, along with husband Todd and kids Bristol, Willow and Track, arrived in a stretch Hummer and that the fighting started as the beer started flowing.
. . . “I heard Sarah Palin yell do you know who I am? All of us could not believe it. We thought we were watching an episode of Jerry Springer,” he added.
~ ABC News: Palin Family in House Party Brawl
The Palins were quick to supply their own version of events:
But according to the Palin family’s version of events, the instigator was actually the former boyfriend.
The initial tussle occurred, the source said, after the young man in question “tried to get in” to the Hummer limousine after he’d engaged in some unspecified “questionable behavior.”
Track Palin soon found himself struggling to fend off four men who had “piled on him,” according to the source.
Todd Palin then inserted himself into the brawl, which left the former “First Dude” of Alaska bleeding.
. . . According to the source, as her husband and son were trading blows with their adversaries, Palin was yelling (in reference to her son), “Don’t you know who he is? He’s a vet!”
. . . “From my understanding, she was in full ‘mama grizzly’ mode defending the kids,” the source said of Sarah Palin’s mindset.
~ RealClearPolitics Version from "Source" close to family
But my favorite version is from Mudflats Blog, which is correct about the Palins 99% of the time:
The Palins arrived at the party, but not just Sarah and Todd who were the only actual invitees from the clan – the whole fan-damnily and some other tagalong friends from Wasilla turned up in a stretch Hummer limo. Because, of course they did. The party was an adult and relaxed event, with most guests at least in their 30s. Reports have come in that Track got into a fight with an ex-boyfriend of Willow’s. But according to my source, the initial fight started when Track and his buddy were aggressively pursuing… how shall I put this… “romantic relations” with some female guests. They were allegedly explicit and crude in their depictions of what they’d like to do with and to the ladies, expressing a desire to “bend them over on the lawn,” according to my source. Apparently the lawn was large enough to include places one could be “bent over.”
. . . Track did not fare well in the ensuing confrontation with the spouse. The irate husband punched Track with the full force of his annoyance, and the young Palin ended up “spread eagle lying on the grass.” You could say someone did end up bent over on the lawn, but not in the way he first envisioned.
. . . Then Sarah shrieked, “Don’t you know who I am?” and other such things making clear the importance of the Palins, and the lack of importance of the non-Palins to whom she was speaking. She then apparently tried to fling herself on top of the giant dog pile into the middle of the melée.
~ Alaska Mudflats Blog
And Mudflats also has the best illustration of the fracas:
#Putin could see the #PalinBrawl from his house..: pic.twitter.com/o8ugffBvqI
— Curtis (D-PA) (@ZonkerPHL) September 15, 2014
"Palin could not be reached for comment." She's probably letting this whole #PalinBrawl thing sink in… #p2 pic.twitter.com/6h8yMxJ99f
— Eric Wolfson (@EricWolfson) September 13, 2014
Exclusive footage of the Palin family fight! #PalinFamilyRiot #PalinBrawl http://t.co/FOjA4j0DBk
— Bob Cesca (@bobcesca_go) September 13, 2014